rolling in the deep

and everyday i’m fucking drowning — or at least, i think this is what drowning feels like: fighting to breathe and stay afloat. the despair is crushing, debilitating; each week is protracted, unadulterated suffering until i clamber to the safety of a weekend which is woefully far too short for any actual recovery. i cannot remember the last time i had a peace of mind.
all too often i wonder about an alternate path i could/would/might have taken.